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Wedding Jokes

  • Writer: Žygimantas Gudanavičius
    Žygimantas Gudanavičius
  • Feb 11
  • 2 min read

Published: 2017.01.07


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Weddings are a serious matter… but at Villa Top, we want to show the funny side of this important day!

We gift you a few moments of laughter with these wedding jokes!

Marriage Timeline

  • 1 year after the wedding – The husband talks, the wife listens.

  • 2 years after the wedding – The wife talks, the husband listens.

  • 3 years after the wedding – Both talk, the neighbors listen.

Wedding Mishap

At a wedding, two tough guys show up unexpectedly:

  • "Did you order a fight for 50 people?"

  • "No, we didn’t!"

  • "Too late, it's already paid for!"

Marital Realization

  • Friend: "What happened to you? You look terrible!"

  • Man: "I was attacked, beaten up, and robbed!"

  • Friend: "Did you at least remember their faces?"

  • Man: "What's the point? I know my wife well enough already…"

A Groom’s Confession

Before the wedding:

  • "I love every woman in the world!"

After the wedding:

  • "One less!"

Finding a Groom

  • Girl: "Will you come to my wedding?"

  • Boy: "Of course, why not?"

  • Girl: "Great, now the groom problem is solved!"

The Truth About Marriage

  • A man would rather die for the woman he loves… than live with her forever.

Why Do Rich, Old Grooms Have So Many Admirers?

  • "Because the chances of ‘till death do us part’ are significantly higher!"

The Meaning of Wedding Attire

  • The bride wears white because it’s the happiest day of her life…

  • The groom wears black because he already knows what’s coming!

The Groom’s New Rules

  • Friend: "So, you got married?"

  • Groom: "Yes."

  • Friend: "And?"

  • Groom: "I can’t drink, I can’t smoke."

  • Friend: "Do you regret it?"

  • Groom: "No. Regret is also forbidden!"

Love at First Sight?

  • Man: "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"

No Room for the Mother-in-Law

  • Husband: "I want to build a round house."

  • Architect: "Why?"

  • Husband: "Because my mother-in-law keeps saying, 'Maybe there’s a corner for me in your house'!"

A Short Visit

  • The mother-in-law arrives for a visit.

  • Son-in-law: "How long do you plan to stay?"

  • Mother-in-law: "Until I annoy you!"

  • Son-in-law: "What? No tea for you then?"


Tags: Wedding Jokes, About Weddings, Humor, Fun Weddings, Wedding Estate, Weddings





 
 
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